1,982 Matches for Scott Russell

Scott Russell, scott.russell.1257

North Attleboro, Massachusetts

  • University of the Moon
  • Morris High School

Scott Russell is the Author of "Joey." At childbirth, I was rejected by my four biological parents and was raised by a pack of wolves. At the age of one, the wolves rejected me and placed me on the doorstep of a schizophrenic Albanian fisherman named Arturo, who on most days insisted he was Saint Joan of Arc. The Department of Social Services intervened and placed me with a group of Ukrainian gypsy midgets . The midgets quickly tired of me, placed me on waivers where I was claimed by the Pittsburgh Pirates who subsequently gave me my unconditional release. I grew morose and sullen (also a fu-manchu) and only found solace in wearing women's undergarments. Since truth is stranger than fiction, I will say this. One of the following four statements is FALSE. 1.I am a huge Philadelphia Phillies fan, attending many games at Citizens Bank Park. 2. I once scored 86 points in an NBA game. 3. I had the same bodyguard as Bobby Kennedy, John and Maureen Dean and E. Howard Hunt. 4. I live with my wife, Peggy and eleven deranged cats including Dexter, the one-eyed orange tabby. I am the author of two extremely silly statistical books on the Red Sox, "Too Much Time on His Hands" and "Still Too Much Time on His Hands." I have also written a novel, "The Scorekeeper" which I have never even submitted to anyone. Perhaps like John Kennedy Toole (A Confederacy of Dunces), I'll publish it posthumously or perhaps after I die, whichever comes first.

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